Would You Rather #10: Feel worse if no one showed up to your wedding or to your funeral?


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The more the people, the merrier the celebration?

Well, I think this depends on the personality of the person being asked. The introverted type would prefer a small gathering (family and close friends) for such social functions. Some even resort to having secret ceremonies just so to keep the ‘not-so-significant’ people out. As for the loud and sociable type who want to share their special moments with everyone they have come across, their doors are always open and they will find a way to accommodate everyone.

Weddings are supposed to be happy moments; shared with people who make one’s joy complete. Funerals on the other hand, are occasions to mourn the passing of a dear one. Nowadays, people have chosen to find the brighter side of such a gloomy ceremony: they call it a celebration of life. Some others request that no such ceremony is prepared for them; they prefer to be cremated. The preferences vary.

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I’m personally not a fan of large crowds hence my having few friends. If no one showed up at my wedding, it would be probably because I invited no one and even if I did and no one did show up, I’d obviously feel bad about it but I think I might feel worse if no one showed up at my funeral.

But someone would argue that when you die, you’re gone; why would you care if no one showed up to mourn you? How would you even know if someone did or did not make it to your burial ceremony?

It is a fair point made but I think what makes a difference between a much-talked-about funeral ceremony and that of another which no one knew had even taken place is the number of people an individual knew, the influence he had on them and the legacy he left behind.

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Typical Ghanaian funeral

As it is commonly said, when you are born, you cry whiles the people who welcome you into the world rejoice; so make it a point that when you do leave this world, you smile whiles the people around you cry. You smile because you know you’ve fulfilled your purpose on earth and others cry because they feel they have lost a treasure.

For the number of years that you’re going to be on this earth, there are a lot of people you’re going to meet: some you’d dislike, some who would despise you, some you’d admire, some you’d influence, some who’d appreciate you and influence you. So how on earth won’t I feel worse if no one not even a hater would show up at my funeral even if it is to spite me?

As for a wedding, my joy would be rest in knowing I’m going to spend my life with someone whom I deeply care about, complements me, makes me a better person and would stay by my side throughout the journey of life. As long as he shows up and we promise ‘I do’ to each other, who cares who else did or did not make it to the ceremony?

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Photo credits to Google Images

To not be celebrated after you’re gone means you wouldn’t be remembered in the hearts of others most likely because of something you did against or did not do for someone. That alone proves you didn’t achieve anything worthwhile with the gift of life and that is the very definition of failure to me.

What do you think, what would hurt you the more, no show at your wedding or funeral and why? I’d love to know your thoughts.

Josephine © Amoako 2016

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27 Comments Add yours

  1. subtleroyalty says:

    The truth is I’m one of those people who don’t like crowds. So I’d very much like a small wedding. I like to think I wouldn’t mind no one coming for the wedding. I got married legally after all, right?
    Also, I think funerals are overrated. If I could just be cremated without much buzz. That will do.
    So really, I’m okay with both but if I had to choose…no one at my wedding would do(Yeah, I have such a strong aversion to crowds hehe)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. joseyphina says:

      It looks like we share the same view on this. Thanks for sharing ☺

      Like

  2. iKomusana says:

    I love crowds, but for my wedding I really just want people who matter
    I don’t want a big stressful wedding where half the people don’t care,
    But for my funeral,
    Girl am dead.. Whether no one shows up I really don’t mind

    Liked by 1 person

    1. joseyphina says:

      I hear you, girl☺

      Liked by 1 person

  3. piratepatty says:

    I’ve had both big and small weddings and I don’t remember being particularly thrilled at either. I’m a very private person and I don’t like crowds.
    As for the funeral, I’m dead so what do I care. But my wishes are to be cremated with no services.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. joseyphina says:

      Thanks for dropping in your comment. Appreciate it 👍

      Liked by 1 person

  4. ferddhie says:

    Lol I’d be dead. Why would I care?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. joseyphina says:

      Haha… Wedding then, huh?

      Like

      1. ferddhie says:

        I don’t know. I’ve never really thought about my wedding. Of course, I would be pretty bummed if no one turned up but I don’t really what type of a wedding I’d like. I guess I’ll leave it up to her to decide

        Liked by 1 person

      2. joseyphina says:

        Oh okay. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Ferddhie

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Thanks so much for following http://fonzandcancer.wordpress.com I really do appreciate it – Fonz

    Liked by 1 person

    1. joseyphina says:

      You’re welcome ☺

      Liked by 1 person

  6. LightWriters says:

    Well, I’m fine about a small intimate wedding, but thinking about not having people show at your funeral …ouch! …that hurts! People showing up to pay ‘last respects’ at a funeral reflects directly on how you lived your life and how many people you respected in life, and whose lives you helped touch or make a difference in…Oh, and I’m sure if you’re with Jesus when you die, you get to see the ‘funeral’ from a heavenly perspective because the Bible says so —- and speaks of a ‘great crowd’ of witnesses surrounding and seeing us from ‘above’…(see Hebrews 12:1)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. joseyphina says:

      I agree with you…thanks for sharing your thoughts with us. ☺

      Like

  7. AtimMercy says:

    Well well, I don’t like crowds, I have alwways admired small intimate weddings, I “know” a few people… so really, I wouldn’t mind if some people dint come to my wedding..
    Funeral… I would be dead. No worries really. Hahaha

    Liked by 1 person

    1. joseyphina says:

      I hear you, Mercy. Thanks for your input 👍

      Liked by 1 person

      1. AtimMercy says:

        You are welcome!.

        Liked by 1 person

  8. AtimMercy says:

    Oh, PS: I love your “Would you rather” posts.. They get me thinking about life more deeply… Keep them coming.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. joseyphina says:

      Thanks, makes me think about what I value in life. I’m glad they do same with you. Enjoy your day, Mercy! ☺

      Liked by 1 person

      1. AtimMercy says:

        Thank you! Enjoy your day too…

        Liked by 1 person

  9. amoafowaa says:

    At my wedding will be horrible and heartbreaking. I won’t care about my funeral because I won’t see them anyway.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. joseyphina says:

      I see your point. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Amoafowaa

      Liked by 1 person

  10. Kim Sweeting says:

    It all depends on why they don’t show up…..:)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. joseyphina says:

      Hmmm… Makes sense. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Kim☺

      Liked by 1 person

  11. Ufuomaee says:

    I have to say you’ve painted the picture heavily in favour of the funeral… and I have to agree with you on that. My wedding has passed and most of the people were friends of my parents! It was their party. Apparently, I’m supposed to take over my child’s as compensation. But I’ll let them make it theirs… am only concerned about whether they make the right choice and are in God’s Kingdom 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. joseyphina says:

      True, what matters is where we end up after we’re gone.

      Liked by 1 person

Thanks for reading; would love to read your thoughts!

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