Saying Yes and No

Daily writing prompt

How often do you say “no” to things that would interfere with your goals?

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Growing up, learning when and how to say yes and no to people and offers remains one of the defining moments in life.

When we were younger, opportunities were pretty more recognizable and hence saying yes was not that difficult. But as life advances, opportunities get more shrouded in unlikely circumstances and when you are lacking in wisdom, discernment and good counsel, you would only realize too late that the situation you avoided was actually gold covered in dust.

Likewise, it was quite easy to say no to certain things because you could tell which ones were obviously not of benefit to you growing up. However, in adulthood, you realize things are not as black and white as you thought them to be. Saying no becomes complicated not because you can’t identify what is right or not for you; but to be sure which ‘good’ ones are a priority to you in that moment in time and if the opportunity cost is something you can deal with.

Do I always get it right? No, I don’t. As someone not too prone to spontaneity, my default answer to most things is ‘no.’ Hence, saying no to things that would interfere with my goals is not much of a challenge to me. On the flip side, I’ll admit my fear of change or unpreparedness to do something new has made me say ‘no’ to some things it wouldn’t have hurt to say ‘yes’ to. Because at the end of the day, what would have been the worst that could have happened? Failed? Most probably. Learned something new? Most likely.

So, one of my everyday prayers this year is for grace and courage to reach out for things I’d instinctively step away from because it takes me out of my comfort zone. So, help me God.

Another adulthood challenge is saying no to some people because you don’t want to disappoint them or make them feel like you are not dependable. And that can get emotionally and physically draining depending on the ask. Hence, one needs to be tactful in how to gently and respectfully turn down requests and demands which get in the way of your personal goals. This way, the third party can understand and appreciate where you are coming from and not strain the relationship.

How easily and often are you able to say no to things that would interfere with your goals?

© Josephine Amoako 2023