Do You Think It’s Cool to Have a Work Spouse? 


You remember back in school where your colleagues used to pair up to study, hang out and everything else in between so as to make their college life a smooth ride? A good percentage of them ended a few months after graduation when the couples found out the relationship has exhausted its value.

Is it possible that phenomenon has found its way in the work place? Work can be stressful no doubt and on some days, it’s a nightmare. We all need one or a couple of persons to rely on during those days to sail through the stress. But how close is too close? Should the lines of professional conduct be blurred because you two ‘click’ so well?

Some colleagues get so comfortable with each other that they are practically in each other’s personal space. They share a table to work, chat and eat. When one is not around, the other looks like a fish out of water. When they are together, it seems they are in a world of their own, oblivious to whatever is going on around them. When they are not talking to each other, the whole office space feels the tension. Mind you, they may not necessarily be romantically involved but platonic ‘better halves’ of each other.

Is it healthy, should it be encouraged? Some would say it has its perks as it can motivate one to come to work early and leave late thus working more thanks to the presence of other colleague who makes work ‘fun.’ It could be okay if both parties are single but what if one or both of them are in serious relationships or married? Does it feel right to risk ‘catching feelings’ for a close friend at work and find yourself emotionally cheating on your partner?

It is natural to start developing a soft spot for people who treat us affectionately; no matter how neutral it feels in the beginning, it is bound to change unless conscious steps are taken to minimize the amount of contact shared.

In the initial stages, it might look cute seeing two colleagues turning into ‘work spouses’ of some sort as an onlooker but it could grow to be irritating and even suffocating in the work space when it is overdone. I think it is great to bond with people we spend several hours with daily but one should know when and where to draw the line to avoid any compromising situation with its subsequent temptations.

What do you think about the idea of work spouses? Do you have one? Is there one in your office? Is it cool or dangerous? Kindly share your thoughts and let’s get talking!

© Josephine Amoako 2017

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21 Comments Add yours

  1. No. Especially if someone is married. Stress reduction can happen through exercise or other enjoyable hobbies and spending quality time with your spouse. I think that’s disrespectful.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. joseyphina says:

      Hmmm…thanks for sharing your thoughts.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Why do you say hmmm. What are you’re thoughts?

        Liked by 1 person

      2. joseyphina says:

        I do agree with you… I wrote that thinking if only people would see things the way you do, it will help prevent many conflicts.

        Liked by 2 people

      3. Not necessarily see things the way I do but to think and be mindful of everyone involved. I once had a situation similar at work where someone who was married with children was too much in my space. It was cool at first because I was trying to help her but when it starting getting weird, and she started trying more and more to distract me from my work, I made a point to ask about her husband and children, and turn down invites to “hang out,” outside of work. She even asked for my address and offered to pick me up from my apartment, at the time so we could, ” hang out at an infamous homecoming parade. I even stopped talking to her because it weirded me out that she was so eager to be friendly, too friendly. Turns out she had ill intentions anyway. People… Ugh!

        Liked by 1 person

      4. joseyphina says:

        Oh wow! Good you saved yourself the trouble! Thanks for sharing your experience.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. jpimbo says:

    I tend to agree with giftd if you consider it cheating and I’m glad you said platonic. There must be a way to meet supportive friends without it being a relationship. I’m a supportive person myself. But you could actually fall in love in a giving relationship with no strings attached. I should remain a professional relationship, in my opinion. Sounds like they would be playing newlywed to keep their spirits up. Get emotionally and spiritually strong!! With the help of Jesus of course.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Debs says:

    I personally frown at this. It may start platonic and you both end up catching feelings. God forbid if one of you is married.

    Aside this, I enjoy my private space at work so much, I prefer keeping colleagues as colleagues. Especially the opposite sex, plus it can really be distracting.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. joseyphina says:

      Totally agree!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. MaKupsy says:

    Once upon a time I fell in love with someone I worked with. It wasn’t by choice but over time we realised we were both on the same page. We didn’t openly showcase our affections but a year later we were expecting our first child. Life is strange, anything can happen anywhere. I am indifferent towards having a spouse at work. Whatever makes people comfortable and happy is what matters in the end. Great read as always Joseyphina 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. joseyphina says:

      Oh wow! Congratulations! Thanks for sharing your experience and for reading.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. gracelarbi says:

    Reblogged this on gracelarbi and commented:
    Lol! This one . Has its pros and cons and its working positively depends solely on the maturity of both workers. If maturity levels are low, issues of jealousy, disagreements between the two and personal squabbles tend to affect work adversely.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. jeffreybotah says:

    I don’t really understand the idea of basically having a partner for work. It doesn’t sound like a good idea if you’re in a relationship, that’s definitely when people have to know boundaries. If both people are single then it’s not a problem.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. joseyphina says:

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Jeffrey. Very much appreciated.

      Like

  7. Ufuomaee says:

    As long as both are single, I think it’s good, and could result in love, as long as they are considerate of others and carry themselves professionally. Definite no no for the married. They can have several close friends of different genders, but not ONE of the opposite gender. That’s just inviting trouble, because no matter how much in control you feel, you can’t control the other person’s feelings.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. joseyphina says:

      I totally agree with you, Ufuomaee. It’s not wise to play with fire thinking you won’t get burned. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Mawuli says:

    Guess the idea is to ensure that we don’t cross lines! Even students do cross lines! If one is married – I will not advice it — if both are single (move with caution)! Respecting each other is the key!! Great write up and an important question!!

    Like

    1. joseyphina says:

      Very well said, Mawuli! 👏

      Like

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