What Was I Thinking? XXX


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I sighed when the cab pulled over in front of the hostel. I paid the driver and got out. I heard a familiar voice on the balcony and looked up. Yeah, it was her.
“Emily?” Her face disappeared from view and a minute later, she came running toward me. She hugged me and I suddenly felt better. She glanced at my suitcase and back at me.
“That bad?” I nodded. She took the bag from me and held my hand. We walked into the room together. I sat down on the bed and sighed. Karen handed me a glass of water. I thanked her and took it. I didn’t even realize that my throat was that dry till the water ran through it. I put the glass down. Karen sat beside me and rubbed my back.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“What is there to say? He is disgusted by the sight of me. Can you believe he expected me to do away with the baby?”
“What?”
“Apparently he suspected that I was indeed pregnant so that’s why he left town for business so I could and I quote ‘do whatever it took to save our marriage.’”
“Seriously? He wouldn’t have had a problem with that?”
“Seemingly so. He now thinks I’m some loose woman.”
“What did you tell him?”
“I said I don’t know how I got pregnant; perhaps it was at some party I attended some time back where I drank too much and lost control.” Karen gaped at me.
“Why would you say that?”
“What else should I have said? That the guy he is so fond of and is investing so much into is responsible for my pregnancy? I don’t want to risk Adam’s career and even his life for my mistake.”
“You care about Adam that much?”
“I do, Karen but that’s not the point. Telling Fitz the truth will crush him. He will feel like we two made a fool out of him and he’d never forgive us. But with this story, he’d only blame me for my recklessness and who knows, he might forgive me after some time and take me back.”
“That’s your plan? To play the victim and hope he’ll take you back with Adam’s baby?”
“No, it’s my baby and mine alone. Making it look like that would make Fitz consider taking him as his own. I know it’s a long shot but I do have a good feeling that my marriage to Fitz is not yet over.”
“You love Fitz that much to go back to him? I thought this would be your chance to walk out.”
“Yeah if this baby thing hadn’t sprung up. But I can’t take care of it on my own. I need someone to help me out.”
“Why not Adam?”
“Adam is young with his whole career ahead of him. Allowing him to make contact with me and the baby endangers that. It would be better if he stayed away.”
“That would be denying him his right to be with his child.”
“That’s an acceptable sacrifice he would have to make to ensure his child gets the best of life being the ward of Fitz Daniels.”
“You have it all planned out, haven’t you?”
“Well, the drive here in a cab was long and quiet enough to let me think so yeah.”
“So what now?” Karen asked.
“Now, we have exams to write. Let’s get them over and done with and I’ll see what I can do.” My phone rang.
“It’s my mother. Wonder why she’s calling,” I said, picking it up.
“Duh, she’s your mum. She can call just because she feels like it.”
“Hello, mummy. I’m fine, thank you. Your son-in-law is fine too.” I glanced at Karen.
“I know it’s been a while since we visited but I’ve told you how busy he is, mum. You have no idea how many arguments we’ve had over this issue. I know, I keep reminding him but things keep coming up. I’m not lying to you, mother. No, you don’t have to call him yourself. I’ll talk to him again. Send my regards to dad. Okay, mum; take care. Bye,” I said and ended the call. I sighed in exhaustion.
“Is she asking what I think she is asking?” Karen asked. I nodded.
“The timing couldn’t be any worse. What if she calls Fitz? Do you think Fitz would tell her everything?”
“Maybe, maybe not. I can’t have my parents on my case right now. If my plan is to work, I’d need them to stay away for as long as possible.”
“Wow…you seem very optimistic about this plan of yours considering your dire situation. I’m impressed.”
“Don’t be; it’s all I have left. I honestly didn’t think Fitz and I would go the whole nine yards but I didn’t plan on us splitting this way.” My phone rang again.
“Adam. My day couldn’t get any worse, could it?” She picked it.
“Hello.”
“Hi…where are you?”
“At the hostel.”
“Great.” The line went dead. I stared at the phone.
“My guess is he’s around the vicinity.” I dropped the phone on the bed and buried my face in my palms. The room fell silent. We heard a rapid knock. Karen got up and walked to the door.
“Hi,” Adam greeted and walked inside. He approached me, squatted in front of me and held my hand.
“How are you doing?”
“Well, I’ve moved out of my matrimonial home. How much worse could it get?”
“He threw you out?”
“Oh no, he is too gentleman for that. He waited for me to suggest it.”
“So what did you tell him?” I looked at him.
“Don’t worry; your career is safe. You don’t have to worry about it.”
“I don’t care about my career. All that matters is how you and our baby are doing.”
“Aww…you’re such a romantic, aren’t you?” I asked cynically.
“Drop it, Em,” Karen scolded as she settled herself beside me. Adam pulled a chair and sat down, still holding on to my hand.
“So who did you say the father was?” Adam asked.
“Someone called I-Don’t-Know. I told him I went wild at a party and I don’t remember the details.”
“That sounds dirty.”
“Yep but safe; I can’t risk giving him a heart attack with the truth.”
“So how long do you intend to stick to this storyline?”
“What do you mean?”
“You know, sooner or later the truth will have to come out.”
“I disagree,” I said. Adam glanced at Karen with a puzzled look.
“Emily has this crazy idea that Fitz will take her back if she keeps up the victim’s act and accept the baby as his as well.” Adam turned a bewildered look at Emily.
“And what about me? I lose my right to my child forever?”
“Be reasonable here, Adam. Why risk such a potentially bright future and career over this baby when there is a good chance he would be well taken care of as Fitz’s?”
“I’m not going to give up my baby, Em.”
“You might as well do so right now, Adam because I’m sticking to this plan for real.”
“I’d rather tell Mr. Daniels the truth and suffer the consequences.”
I looked at him with a stunned look and broke into laughter.
“What’s funny?” Adam asked.
“You are! Thinking you can handle this. This is serious, Adam. You are almost a celebrity and any information be it personal or business is up for grabs. Picture this: Up and coming artiste impregnates sponsor’s wife. Can you handle that? Your career will take a nosedive for life because Fitz would make it his personal mission to sink you for life for humiliating him.”
“We will face whatever he throws at us,” Adam insisted.
“If you want a smart way to deal with this, I suggest you take the next available flight to Washington DC and go see Olivia Pope because if this story breaks, we are sure to have a huge scandal on our hands.”
“Good one, Emily but I’m serious.”
“So am I! I am trying to save you from risking you whole life because of my mistake!”
“And I appreciate it but I don’t want to move on as if you never existed. I love you, Emily and I want to prove that to you.”
“You don’t have to do that by doing something stupid, Adam. You can relax knowing that your child would be well raised by Fitz Daniels.”
“I also think Emily is getting over her head with her conviction that Fitz would come back for her but I have to agree with her on this. You have to let this go, Adam; for everyone’s sake, “Karen chipped in.

What they were saying made sense. Emily was giving him a way out. Any other guy would jump at the offer. A part of him wanted to. But to give up Emily and his first child for his career which has no future guarantee would be unwise. He would not give up on Emily without a fight. Not just yet.

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